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How to Stop Worrying and Start Living |
最新书评 共 5 条
Hammer
读这本书是自己上一年最焦虑的时候,当时,现实把之前自己不切实际的外贸发财梦破灭,在一间外贸工厂工作了一个月,果断辞职,待业在家,每天不是在找工作,就是在找工作的路上,身心疲倦,每天都生活在焦虑,彷徨,迷茫和对未来的恐惧当中,特别是爸妈无言的压力,和周围有同学开始拿到各种offer的氛围,更是让自己苦不堪言,怎么都淡定不起来。
之后,在读着卡内基大叔这本书的同时,自己一直努力着,思考着,慢慢也熬过了这段艰难的日子。之后,不知道是运气,还是努力有了回报,跑了无数个面试之后,在年末拿到了最喜欢的offer,现在入职一个多月,一切感觉良好,现在觉得当初的焦虑,当时所谓的困难根本不是困难,所有的患得患失,犹豫,焦虑,是你成长道路上一定要克服的障碍,焦虑和恐惧都不可怕,重要的是,你依然要果断去行动。
这本书当时是给自己打鸡血用的。里面很多技巧很有用,里面很多名人名句,事例,都在不断加深我把这本书当成鸡血书的定位。
说此书是鸡血书并无贬义的意思,当你焦虑,犹豫,彷徨的时候,我敢说,那些小技巧都是没有太大实际意义的,特别是,当你和我一样,本来就是一个理性主义者的时候。
面临一个抉择,面临一个大的困难,遇到一个你感觉不是马上能解决的重大问题,你生活在压力,焦虑当中的时候,所有的理性分析,技巧,对当时的你来说,都只是鸡肋罢了。即管你已经很明白,一切都只不过是时间问题,只要努力,只要主动,只要再耐心一些,问题会迎刃而解的。
那时候你最需要的,不是书上的技巧,不是理性分析(假定你本来就不是个笨蛋),是能令你,带着焦虑的心的同时,仍有动力行动起来的决心。
一切能令你真正在焦虑的同时行动起来的东西都是好东西。而那时候,往往不是书本,是你最亲近,不会伤害你。你可以向他抱怨,发牢骚,听你说着漫无边际的说话的好朋友,是会一直给予你支持的爱人,是想尽办法不想给你压力的家人,最后,是所有能给你打鸡血的文章,实例,经验,名人名言!!统称,鸡血文!
这本书不能给你一个好兄弟,好姐妹,好爱人,好家人,但是能提供最后一样东西,大量的鸡血,和辅助鸡血的技巧。
一切的目的,就是让你行动起来。
你一定要相信,在你最黑暗,最焦虑的时候,只要带着书上提到的一些分析技巧,秉着理性,务实的作风,行动起来,一切都会好起来的。
卡内基大叔最后是这么说:
We already know enough to lead perfect lives. We have all read the golden rule and the Sermon on the Mount. Our trouble is not ignorance, but inaction.
我们知道的已经足够让我们过上幸福美满的生活了。你已经读过了无数的黄金法则,大师智慧,我们的问题不在于无知,而是不作为。
而这本书,就是给你大量的鸡血,实例,最终,让你行动起来!
在你明白了,自己是在looking for action的时候,此时是你读这本书最佳之时。
So, this is an action book.Let's turn the pages
A great journey is about to begin.
Good Luck
End
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全文摘抄:
Part One - Fundamental Facts You Should Know About Worry
1. RULE 1:
If you want to avoid worry, do what Sir William Osier did: Live in "day-tight
compartments". Don't stew about the future. Just live each day until bedtime.
RULE 2: The next time Trouble-with a capital T- comes gunning for you and backs you up
in a corner, try the magic formula of Willis H. Carrier:
a. Ask yourself, "What is the worst that can possibly happen if I can't solve my problem?"
b. Prepare yourself mentally to accept the worst-if necessary.
c. Then calmly try to improve upon the worst-which you have already mentally agreed
to accept.
RULE 3: Remind yourself of the exorbitant price you can pay for worry in terms of your
health. "Business men who do not know how to fight worry die young."
2.the best possible way to
prepare for tomorrow is to concentrate with all your intelligence, all your enthusiasm,
on doing today's work superbly today. That is the only possible way you can prepare for
the future. By all means take thought for the tomorrow, yes, careful thought and planning and
preparation. But have no anxiety.
3.When the cruel Chinese war lords wanted to torture their prisoners, they would tie their
prisoners hand and foot and put them under a bag of water that constantly dripped ...
dripped ... dripped ... day and night. These drops of water constantly falling on the
head finally became like the sound of hammer blows-and drove men insane
Part Two - Basic Techniques In Analysing Worry
RULE 1: Get the facts. Remember that Dean Hawkes of Columbia University said that "
half the worry in the world is caused by people trying to make decisions before they
have sufficient knowledge on which to base a decision."
RULE 2: After carefully weighing all the facts, come to a decision.
RULE 3: Once a decision is carefully reached, act! Get busy carrying out your decisionand
dismiss all anxiety about the outcome.
RULE 4: When you, or any of your associates are tempted to worry about a problem,
write out and answer the following questions:
a. What is the problem?
b. What is the cause of the problem?
c. What are all possible solutions?
d. What is the best solution?
In A Nutshell
1. Develop a deep, driving desire to master the principles of conquering worry.
2. Read each chapter twice before going on to the next one.
3. As you read, stop frequently to ask yourself how you can apply each suggestion.
4. Underscore each important idea.
5. Review this book each month.
6. Apply these principles at every opportunity. Use this volume as a working handbook
to help you solve your daily problems.
7. Make a lively game put of your learning by offering some friend a shilling every time
he catches you violating one of these principles.
8. Check up each week on the progress you are making. Ask yourself what mistakes you
have made, what improvement, what lessons you have learned for the future.
9. Keep a diary in the back of this book showing how and when you have applied these
principles.
Part Three - How To Break The Worry Habit Before It Breaks You
RULE 1: Crowd worry out of your mind by keeping busy. Plenty of action is one of the
best therapies ever devised for curing "wibber gibbers".
RULE 2: Don't fuss about trifles. Don't permit little things-the mere termites of life-to
ruin your happiness. Remember "Life is too short to be little.".
RULE 3: Use the law of averages to outlaw your worries. Ask yourself: "What are the
odds against this thing's happening at all?"
RULE 4: Co-operate with the inevitable. If you know a circumstance is beyond your
power to change or revise, say to yourself "It is so; it cannot be otherwise."
RULE 5: Put a "stop-loss" order on your worries. Decide just how much anxiety a thing
may be worth-and refuse to give it any more.
RULE 6: Let the past bury its dead. Don't saw sawdust
为了今天
Just For Today
1. Just for today I will be happy. This assumes that what Abraham Lincoln said is true,
that "most folks are about as happy as they make up their minds to be." Happiness is
from within; it is not a matter of externals.
2. Just for today I will try to adjust myself to what is, and not try to adjust everything
to my own desires. I will take my family, my business, and my luck as they come and fit
myself to them.
3. Just for today I will take care of my body. I will exercise it, care for it, nourish it, not
abuse it nor neglect it, so that it will be a perfect machine for my bidding.
4. Just for today I will try to strengthen my mind. I will learn something useful. I will
not be a mental loafer. I will read something that requires effort, thought and
concentration.
5. Just for today I will exercise my soul in three ways: I will do somebody a good turn
and not get found out. I will do at least two things I don't want to do, as William James
suggests, just for exercise.
6. Just for today I will be agreeable. I will look as well as I can, dress as becomingly as
possible, talk low, act courteously, be liberal with praise, criticise not at all, nor find
fault with anything and not try to regulate nor improve anyone.
7. Just for today I will try to live through this day only, not to tackle my whole life
problem at once. I can do things for twelve hours that would appall me if I had to keep
them up for a lifetime.
8. Just for today I will hav
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我楽苦
FUNDAMENTAL FACTS YOU SHOULD KNOW ABOUT WORRY
RULE 1: if you want to avoid worry, do what Sir William Osier did: Live in "day-tight compartments". don't stew about the future. just live each day until bedtime.
RULE 2: the next time Trouble--with a capital T--comes gunning for you and backs you up in a corner, try the magic formula of Willis H. Carrier:
a. ask yourself, "what is the worst that can possibly happen if I can't solve my problem?"
b. prepare urself mentally to accept the worst--if necessary.
c. then calmly try to improve upon the worst--which you have already mentally agreed to accept.
RULE 3: remind urself of the exorbitant price you can pay for worry in terms of your health. "business men who do not know how to fight worry die young."
---------------------------------------------------------------
BASIC TECHNIQUES IN ANALYZING WORRY
RULE 1: Get the facts. remember that Dean Hawkes of Columbia University said that "half the worry in the world is caused by ppl trying to make decisions be4 they have sufficient knowledge on which to base a decision."
RULE 2: after carefully weighing all the facts, come to a decision.
RULE 3: once a decision is carefully reached, act! get busy carrying out ur decision--and dismiss all anxiety about the outcome.
RULE 4: when u, or any of ur associaties are tempted to worry about a problem, write out and answer the following questions:
a. what is the problem?
b. what is the cause of the problem?
c. what are all possible solutions?
d. what is the best solution?
-------------------------------------------------
HOW TO BREAK THE WORRY HABBIT BE4 IT BREAKS U
RULE 1: crowd worry out of ur mind by keeping busy. plenty of action is one of the best therapies ever devised for curing "wibber gibbers".
RULE 2: don't fuss about trifles. don't permit little things--the mere termites of life--to ruin ur happiness.
RULE 3: use the law of averages to outlaw ur worries. ask urself:" what are the odds against this thing's happening at all?"
RULE 4: co-operate with the inevitable. if you know a circumstance is beyond ur power to change or revise, say to urself "it is so; t cannot be otherwise."
RULE 5: put a "stop-loss" order on ur worries. decide just how much anxiety a thing may be worthand refuse to give it any more.
RULE 6: let the past bury its dead. don't saw sawdust.
-------------------------------------------------
SEVEN WAYS TO CULTIVATE A MENTAL ATTITUDE THAT WILL BRING U PEACE AND HAPPINESS
RULE 1: let's fill our minds with thoughts of peace, courages, health, and hope, for "our life is what out thoughts make it".
RULE 2: let's never try to get even with our enemies, because if we do we will hurt ourselves far more than we hurt them. let's do as General Eisenhower does: let's never waste a minute thinking about ppl we dont like.
RULE 3:
A. instead of worrying about ingratitude, let's expect it. let's remember the Jesus healed ten leper in one day--and only one thanked Him. why should we expect more gratitude than Jesus got?
B. let's remember that the only way to find happiness is not expect gratitude--but to give for the joy of giving.
C. lets remember the gratitude is a "cultivated" trait; so if we want our children to be grateful, we must train them to be grateful.
RULE 4: count ur blessings--not ur troubles!
RULE 5: lets not imitate others. lets find ourselves and be ourselves, for "envy is ignorance" and "imitation is suicise".
RULE 6: when fate hands us a lemon, lets try to make a lemonade.
RULE 7: lets forget our own unhappiness--by trying to create a little happiness for others. 'when you are good to others, u r best to urself.'
----------------------------------------------------------------------
HOW TO KEEP FROM WORRYING ABOUT CRITICISM
RULE 1: unjust criticism is often a disgusting compliment. it often means that you have aroused jealousy and ency. remember that no one ever kicks a dead dog.
RULE 2: do the very best u can; and then put up ur old umbrella and keep the rain of criticism from running down the back of ur neck.
RULE 3: lets keep a record of the fool things we have done and criticise ourselves. since we cant hope to be perfect, lets do what E.H.Little did: lets ask for unbiased, helpful, constructive criticism.
----------------------------------------------------------------------
SIX WAYS TO PREVENT FATIGUE AND WORRY AND KEEP UR ENERGY AND SPIRITS HIGH
RULE 1: rest before u get tired.
RULE 2: learn to relax at ur work.
RULE 3: if u r a housewife, protect ur health and appearance by relaxing at home.
RULE 4: apply these four good working habits
a. clear ur desk of all papers except those relating to the immediate problem at hand.
b. do thind in the order of their importance.
c. when u face a problem, solve it then and there if u have the facts necessary to make a decision.
d. learn to organise, deputise, and supervise.
RULE 5: to prevent worry and fatigue, put enthusiasm into ur work.
RULE 6: remember, no one was ever killed by lack of sleep. it is worrying about insomnia that does the damage--not the insomnia.
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alex
About 3 months ago, I had a a casual meeting with this book, At that time , my colleague was reading it. he told me this book could help us take worry away and in the meantime we could go over the words. So i picked it up and read it. From that time , i indulged in this book by it's wonderful stories and it's brief but brillant adages.
If you still didn't read this book, i strongly recommend that you should have a cup of cofe and pick a peaceful afternoon and read it in the sunshine. i promise you should get a lot of bennefit from this book.Good luck !
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