Lean In - 书评

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　　Thirty years after women became 50 percent of the college graduates in the United States, men still hold the vast majority of leadership positions in government and industry. This means that women ...

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广角长

　　I have read many of the researches and discussions the book mentioned, thus many talks in the book are not new to me. As the author mentioned, this book does not intend to provide solutions; and it did not. However, it is still very soothing for the soul to learn that, in that many occasions, you are not alone; that in moments when struggles, confusions, and fears linger about and just would let go, it is natural to feel in a certain way.
　　
　　Do not blame yourself. You showed up so well. It is not because that. I still remember the moment when I heard these words from her. I knew she was concerned. The moment that I pulled almost all my strength to control my tears.
　　
　　Move on, let it go, move on. And keep fighting.

JCWong

　　Sandberg给我的感觉是 知道哪里会碰壁，然后选择低头，温柔地避开的实用主义。个人口味，Marissa Mayer才是spirit animal，女神款！
　　
　　但因这本书 写书的人确实从是实用主义出发的，书写的除了确实有点喋喋不休，一个故事拖的过于长之外，还是有些启发的意义。
　　
　　摘一些我觉得有感触的，或者好玩的。没注明感触的，都是开放式。我可能同意 或 不同意，我可能看到原文 就想到另一件事上了。反之大家的三观都有点差别，看原文，自己感受吧。
　　
　　
　　
　　幽默
　　
　　1】在说自己当年读书时没电脑，然后吐槽自己在电脑房拼老命摸索了半天的时候“That’s right. Years before Mark famously crashed that same Harvard system, I beat him to it.”
　　
　　2】Sandberg的脑内小剧场貌似也很高能，读她的书时候时不时让我感觉她在开启暴走模式。。。
　　
　　“It would have been so cool to have thanked her for being honest and walked out of her office. But alas, I was never cool. I sat there hemming and hawing until every last molecule of oxygen had been sucked from the room. True to her word, she never even considered hiring me.”
　　
　　3】在说家庭的时候，谈到一开始她未婚夫和她工作的地方不太一个城市时，Sandberg如是说...“Dave and I were not even working in the same city when I got pregnant (although just to be clear, we were in the same place when I got pregnant).”
　　
　　噗。。。突然涌现出Sheryl酱边写上面那段边邪魅一笑 伴随着噗嗤一声的画面感。
　　
　　
　　
　　Thought-provoking:
　　
　　
　　1】关于Success and Likeability
　　
　　One of the tings he told me was that your desire to be liked by everyone would hold me back He said that when you want to change things, you can’t please everyone. If you do please everyone, you aren't making enough progress. Mark was right.
　　
　　【first impression 很重要。要自我定位。】
　　
　　
　　2】Then he explained that only one criterion mattered when picking a job—fast growth.
　　
　　3】Hard work and results should be recognized by others, but when they aren’t, advocating for oneself becomes necessary.
　　
　　4】The strongest relationships spring out of a real and often earned connection felt by both sides. Excel and you will get a mentor.
　　
　　5】Never ask question that she could have found the answer to on her own.
　　
　　6】“What is Facebook’s culture like?” shows more ignorance than interest in the company, since there are hundreds of articles that provide this answer. Preparation is especially important when looking for a job.
　　
　　He told me to figure out what I wanted to do before I went to see the people who had the ability to hire me. That way I would not waste my one shot seeking general
　　
　　7】Getting the attention of a senior person with a virtuoso performance works, but it’s not the only way to get a mentor. I have seen lower-level employees nimbly grab a moment after a meeting or in the hall to ask advice from a respected and busy senior person. The exchange is casual and quick. After taking that advice, the would-be mentee follows up to offer thanks and then uses that opportunity to ask for more guidance. Without even realizing it, the senior person becomes involved and invested in the junior person’s career. The word “mentor” never needs to be uttered. The relationship is more important than the label.
　　
　　8】Statements of opinion are always more constructive in the first person “I” form. Compare these two statements: “You never take my suggestions seriously” and “I feel frustrated that you have not responded to my last four e-mails, which leads me to believe that my suggestions are not that important to you. Is that so?” The former can elicit a quick and defensive “That’s not true!” The latter is much harder to deny. One triggers a disagreement; the other sparks a discussion.
　　
　　I wish I could always maintain this perspective in all my communications. I don’t—but I continue to try. Truth is also better served by using simple language. Office-speak often contains nuances and parentheticals that can bury not just the lead but the entire point. Comedies like Office Space ring true for a reason.
　　
　　9】We had never met before, and I will never forget that strong introduction. I ended the meeting by thanking Chad for his candor and then posted the story on Facebook to encourage the rest of the company to follow his example. Mark feels the same way. At a summer barbecue four years ago, an intern told Mark that he should work on his public speaking skills. Mark thanked him in front of everyone and then encouraged us to extend him a full-time job offer.
　　
　　10】Make sure they aren’t limiting their options unnecessarily.
　　
　　11】O’Connor now refers to herself as “a career-loving parent,” a nice alternative to “working mom.”
　　
　　12】While it’s hard to predict how an individual will react to becoming a parent, it’s easy to predict society’s reaction.
　　
　　13】Don’t put on the brakes. Accelerate.
　　
　　14】Whenever a married woman asks me for advice on co-parenting with a husband, I tell her to let him put the diaper on the baby any way he wants as long as he’s doing it himself. And if he gets up to deal with the diaper before being asked, she should smile even if he puts that diaper on the baby’s head. Over time, if he does things his way, he’ll find the correct end. But if he’s forced to do things her way, pretty soon she’ll be doing them herself. Anyone who wants her mate to be a true partner must treat him as an equal—and equally capable—partner.
　　
　　15】Each partner needs to be in charge of specific activities or it becomes too easy for one to feel like he’s doing a favor instead of doing his part.
　　
　　16】“It’s really hard to listen to your baby cry while your struggling husband with no breasts tries desperately and sometimes awkwardly to comfort her. David was insistent that rather than handing the baby to me when she was crying, we allow him to comfort her even if it took longer. It was harder in the short run, but it absolutely paid off when our daughter learned that Daddy could take care of her as well as Mommy.”
　　
　　17】Sharing the burden of the mundane can make all the difference.
　　
　　18】In the coming years, our balancing act may get harder. Our children are still young and go to sleep early, which gives me plenty of time to work at night and even to watch what Dave considers to be truly bad TV. As the kids get older, we will have to adjust. Many of my friends have told me that teenage children require more time from their parents. Every stage of life has its challenges. Fortunately, I have Dave to figure it out with me. He’s the best partner I could imagine—even though he’s wrong about my TV shows being bad.
　　
　　19】The things make the bad boys sexy do not make them good husbands.
　　
　　20】We accepted the negative caricature of a bra-burning, humorless, man-hating feminist. She was not someone we wanted to emulate, in part because it seemed like she couldn’t get a date. Horrible, I know —the sad irony of rejecting feminism to get male attention and approval. In our defense, my friends and I truly, if navely, believed that the world did not need feminists anymore.